How I Got My Agent

Dear Diary, I’m represented by my dream literary agent!

This new chapter of my publishing adventure already feels like sunshine, butterflies, and rainbows, but guess what?

The journey to get here wasn’t easy. Not even close.

My second trip to Hell—I mean, the query trenches—had a happy ending, but I’m not just going to talk about that. I’ll save the fluffy stuff for later. First, I have to hit rewind and start from the beginning.

So, are you ready to read my obligatory How I Got My Agent post?

Of course you are. That’s why you’re here.

The Prologue

Okay, stop rolling your eyes. The prologue in this story is important. Trust me.

In June 2022, I graduated with my MFA in Writing Popular Fiction from Seton Hill University, and I was ready to chase my traditional publishing dreams. So, in July, I started querying. Basically, I had no idea what I was doing. With each manuscript I queried, I became less clueless, and after sending three books into the trenches for almost a year and four months, I landed representation. In April 2024, I went on submission, and I thought I would finally get a publishing deal.

Spoiler alert.

I did not.

Fast forward to this spring.

Hey, don’t be nosy. I’m not going to spill the tea, okay?

All you need to know is I made the choice to seek new representation.

And this is where the main plot begins.

See, the prologue wasn’t that bad, was it?

The Choice

Have you ever heard that the right choice is often the hardest?

Yeah, no joke.

Deciding to seek new representation was probably the most difficult choice I have ever made in my life, but the right one for me and my future career. After being on submission and having my manuscript in editors’ inboxes, it was rough coming to terms with the fact that I would need to go back into the query trenches. This realization wrecked my mental health for a while.

When I first entered the trenches in 2022, I was clueless about publishing as a whole, but now, I’m not. Do I know everything about the industry? Absolutely not. But I have gained a ton of experience as an author, editor, and literary agent intern. One of the only positives to querying again was that I felt prepared.

But here’s the thing, I knew exactly what I was getting myself into this time around.

Rejections. Long wait times. Uncertainty. Email anxiety. Refreshing my inbox and QueryTracker. Imposter syndrome. Tears. Wavering hope. All of it.

Put simply, querying absolutely sucks.

I kept telling myself that I survived the trenches once and could do so again, but this didn’t help much. For days, I stalled because trying to find a new agent felt so daunting. Eventually, though, I dug up my QueryTracker account from the grave, resubscribed to premium, and hoped for the best.

Why?

Because I believed my champion was out there, and after getting so close to my publishing dreams becoming reality, giving up was not an option.

So, back into the query trenches I went.

But first, I need to talk about my manifestation butterflies.

My Manifestation Butterflies

If you know me, you know I love butterflies. When I started querying in April, I decided to get some caterpillars and raise them. I got five, and over the next several weeks, they transformed into their beautiful winged forms.

Butterflies mean a lot to me, and especially during this time, I needed the reminder that I would find my wings again someday. In many ways, I experienced my own metamorphosis this year.

When I let my butterflies go, I asked the last one if it would get me my offer of representation. Though this butterfly isn’t alive anymore, I know it carried my wish into the universe when it flew off my hand.

Meet my offer butterfly!

Thanks, butterfly. You had one job, and you did it perfectly.

The Query Trenches

In hindsight, my second trip into the trenches wasn’t horrible. I obviously thought it was the worst while I was querying, but compared to the first time, things went way better.

Along with knowing what I was doing this time, I have built some truly wonderful relationships in the industry over the past few years. Networking goes such a long way, and that was proven to be true when I was in the trenches. Being a loyal member of the writing community resulted in friends and others I didn’t personally know boosting the crap out of my mood board, referrals from agent friends, and agents reaching out with invites to query them. So, in general, making genuine connections with others in publishing is one of the best things any author can do. It’s incredible knowing so many people in the industry who share my love for the art of storytelling, and I always do my best to lift up others who are chasing the same dreams as me. When I give back to the writing community out of the goodness of my heart, I never ask for anything in return, so I can’t put into words how much it meant seeing so many kind people show up for me when I needed the support most.

I have never felt comfortable sharing my stats because my path to representation was my own unique journey that I don’t want to reduce to numbers. Still, I’ll let you know some things. I sent over a hundred queries, and even though I got lots of rejections, my request rate was higher than all three manuscripts from the first time I queried combined. Also, I started querying on April 9 and received my offer of representation on November 4, so I was in the trenches for about seven months.

During those seven months, I made a new friend.

Publishers Marketplace!

PM and I are total besties at this point. After doing my literary agent internship at the beginning of the year and having access to PM, I decided I couldn’t live without it. So, when I started querying, I got my own account. I loved being able to research agents and stay updated with who was making deals. Even though I’m represented again now, I’m keeping my PM account because I eat Publishers Lunch for breakfast—don’t judge, the deal reports hit my inbox around my breakfast time—and as someone who enjoys research, I’ll poke around for potential editors who may like my books.

There I go daydreaming about being on submission again soon.

Want to know what else I love?

Anthologies!

My friends call me the Anthology Queen because I’m obsessed with submitting short stories to anthologies. While querying, I wrote a ton of short stories, got lots of acceptances, and celebrated publications. The anthology world brought me so much joy this year, and I plan on writing and submitting more short stories when I’m on submission.

Curious what else brought me joy when I was in the trenches?

Plotting my YA gothic thriller!

From May to October, I spent an insane amount of time plotting my YA gothic thriller, then I paused to revise my YA locked room thriller at the beginning of November. Getting excited about a new book idea is always a magical feeling, and I had so much fun working on my gothic thriller. Returning to my prep document for this story when querying got tough brought me light during the dark moments.

Still, even when I was hanging out in the anthology world and gothic thriller land, I kept hoping I would get an offer of representation.

And I did!

Ready to meet my agent?

Say hi to Ciara!

Signing with Ciara Smith at Spencerhill Associates

I couldn’t be happier that I’m now represented by Ciara Smith at Spencerhill Associates!

Here’s the story of how I signed with her.

Back in May, Ciara saw that I was seeking new representation, and she reached out to me on Twitter and invited me to query her. I tried to be chill when I responded, but in my head, I was like, OMG!!!

Luckily now, Ciara knows I’m the least chill person on the planet.

Anyway, I queried her, then waited, and waited, and waited.

In July, I received a golden personalized pass on my first fifty pages from another agent. Since I really resonated with the feedback, I decided to withdraw my outstanding queries and requests to revise. Ciara hadn’t gotten to my submission yet, so I told her I would resubmit my updated materials in a few weeks.

On July 31, I stayed up until almost midnight to requery her when she opened. If you know me, you know I need my sleep, so sacrificing time in dream land to query her should say a lot about how excited I was. Waiting until the morning wasn’t going to happen.

The next day, August 1, Ciara requested my partial, the first fifty pages. Before I could give myself a chance to freak out and reread my whole book for the millionth time, I sent the manuscript.

Then, I waited, and waited, and waited some more. Time honestly felt like it was going backward.

In September, Ciara posted on Twitter that she would start reading partials in October. So, naturally, when I woke up on October 1, I knew my days of peace were over.

On October 23, Ciara responded to my submission when I was about to go to sleep. Like, my phone was in my hand, and I was two seconds away from turning it off when it buzzed. I saw the email was from QueryTracker, and for a second, I considered not looking because I was tired and couldn’t deal with a rejection at the time. Then, I saw the notification was from Ciara, and my thoughts went something like this.

Oh, no. No. No. No.

What if she hated the partial?

What if this is a rejection?

Gosh, I really can’t handle a rejection from her right now.

I can’t open this.

Interiority at its finest. Told you I have no chill.

Eventually, I opened the email to find that Ciara requested my full manuscript, and one thought played in my brain on a loop.

OMG, SHE REQUESTED THE FULL!!!

So, I sent the manuscript, then didn’t sleep. Are you seeing a pattern here?

My sleep schedule is absolutely doomed. Though, if Ciara wants to call me in the middle of the night to tell me we got an offer on my book, I won’t complain.

Anyway, I was a total mess during the days following the full request. I’m not kidding. At random moments, I just started crying because I wanted Ciara to offer so badly. I like suspense when I’m writing my thrillers, not in real life when I’m the main character.

The outcome would be one of three things.

1. A rejection.

2. A revise and resubmit.

3. An offer.

On October 29, I woke up to an email from Ciara. She sent it late the night before at 11:31 to be exact, and I was already asleep. Would you look at that?

But wait.

She actually emailed me, rather than sending me a response through QueryTracker.

Here’s some more interiority for you.

Okay, this definitely isn’t a rejection. If it was, she would have notified me through QT.

But it could be an R&R.

What if it’s an offer?

OMG, this could be an offer!

The subject line was the title of my manuscript, so that gave me no hints.

After pacing around my room for a hot minute, I opened the email.

CIARA LOVED MY BOOK AND WANTED TO SET UP A CALL!!!

I couldn’t have felt happier. This was the best email to wake up to, I swear. After nearly seven months in the trenches, I finally got the call I had wished for.

Ciara didn’t say she was going to offer representation, but the email didn’t give R&R vibes, so I was 99 percent sure she would offer.

We set up the call for November 4, and the wait felt like an eternity.

Finally, the big day came, and Ciara told me she was offering representation pretty much right away.

On the outside, I fought to stay calm, but inside, I was losing my mind.

My offer call with Ciara was the best call of my life. I loved chatting with her about my book, her editorial vision, my future career, our partnership, and all the things. I couldn’t have dreamed up a more perfect offer call if I tried.

Then, I went vague. Those two weeks felt like an even longer eternity.

On November 18, I accepted Ciara’s offer of representation.

And now, I’m officially represented by my dream agent!

I did a success story interview for QueryTracker, and you can read it here.

I’m beyond grateful to have Ciara as my agent. Her belief in me and my stories means the absolute world to me, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds.

Speaking of the future, I have a choice to make.

Fantasy Or Thriller?

One of the first things Ciara told me after signing was that I need to decide if I want to debut as a fantasy or thriller author. I’ll have to stick with the genre I choose for a few books before switching to the other.

So, I’m currently at a fork in the road.

This is a huge decision, but I know Ciara will help me make the right choice.

The two books I need to pick between are my young adult fantasy, A Flurry of Snow and Gemstones, and my young adult locked room thriller, Sweeter Than Revenge.

I’m delighted to share some art for both books. Isabelle Martinsen illustrated my characters, and Aaliyah Paolucci made the mood boards. Both of them are beyond talented and absolute gems.

Meet Alaina, the main character in A Flurry of Snow and Gemstones.

Here’s the mood board for A Flurry of Snow and Gemstones.

Meet Ember, the main character in Sweeter Than Revenge.

Here’s the mood board for Sweeter Than Revenge.

Also, since my fantasy is the book Ciara offered on, Alaina wanted to be part of my agent announcement.

Ciara made her own celebratory graphic with my mood board, too.

Will I choose fantasy or thriller? Not sure yet. Maybe I’ll let Alaina and Ember fight it out. They would be evenly matched. Alaina may have magic, but Ember is a fierce one.

Acknowledgements

I can’t wrap up this story without acknowledgements.

First, thank you to all my friends in the publishing industry who have shown me so much kindness and support this year. There wasn’t a single moment where I felt alone because I always had such wonderful people around me.

Thank you to my parents for putting up with my mood swings while I was querying, for listening to me complain about how much things sucked, and for encouraging me to keep going.

Thank you to all the agents who considered my work, gave me personalized feedback, requested my manuscript, and shared such kind words when I reported my offer of representation.

And thank you to Ciara for being the absolute best. I couldn’t feel luckier to be represented by her.

And that, dear reader, is how I got my agent. The journey wasn’t a piece of cake, but I celebrated with one.

I’m so happy and hopeful, and I’m ready to keep chasing my publishing dreams with Ciara by my side.

Oh, one more thing. Yellow is my new favorite color. I’ll leave you to wonder why.